Trashionista

I'm tired of buying the wrong book.

Finally!!! A pretty book review blog that talks about chick-lits... http://www.trashionista.com/.

I've really liked Cecilia Ahern's first 3 books ("PS, I Love You"; "Where the Rainbow Ends" and "If You Could See Me Now"); but this one I'm reading at the moment, "A Place Called Here"... Gosh - it's very difficult to finish. It's driving me crazy.
I really don't like not finishing a book I've started to read but at the same time - I really can't find the motivation to keep reading.

Lesson learn? Should check with Trashionista first! :P

Or maybe, check with AllReaders? :)

Letter Written in 2070 (SlideShow)

Check out the A Letter From The Year 2070 slide show.

As Zen has said on his recent post; the message that it delivers is very powerful.

Come to think of it, the year 2070 is less than 63 years away from us.. Let's all do something together before it's too late.

Calamity

I've never recalled seeing this word prior, but for some reason, it popped up on me twice in the past week.

First, through Zen's blog post: Purpose on the 22nd October 2007.
Then again today, through the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book that I'm currently reading (refer page 286 Chapter 18: The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore).

It seems to be how our brain works: found something new - register the new thing - the new thing seems to keep reappearing - then after a while, our brain no longer register the new thing because it becomes used to the occurrence of the new (now old) thing.

Anyway - I thought it'd be good for me to note down the meaning of the word.

Definition of Calamity:
1. An event that brings terrible loss, lasting distress, or severe affliction; a disaster: A hurricane would be a calamity for this low-lying coastal region.
2. Dire distress resulting from loss or tragedy.
--taken from answers.com

Hmm.. I find it a little annoying that I keep connecting the word "calamity" to the word "calm" while they have such an opposite meaning.

26 October 2007:
I saw the word - again. See picture below...

Three times in a week! Now I surely will remember the meaning - at least for a longgggggggg time.

Over Sensitivity

Inspired by the article "Let troubles bounce off you: Why you shouldn't assume every frown is your fault" by Gayle Forman.
-- Taken from Self Magazine June 2007 edition page 143.

"But assuming you're responsible for everyone's bad day is narcissistic, not to mention a big burden."

Ask me if you want to know more about the burden part of it.

According to the article (plus some Baker's quotes from the recommended reading below); the following tips will help:

• If you think telling yourself that you're the cause of all the bad things that are happening around the world (wars; earthquakes; etc) - realise that believing that everyone's mood is linked to something you did is just as absurd.


• When you see a friend with a glum face, offer to help instead of taking it personally. Even if your offer is rejected; you'll feel better to have offered.


• Quite possibly; our tendency of 'taking things personally' are due to our guilt - of not being the best friend or partner. "Before bed, ask, Have I done a good job of being a human today?" "If so, stop beating yourself up."

To see if you are over-sensitive; check out this quiz; Are you oversensitive? by NinjaPirate.

If you want to read more on this topic; check out "Over Sensitivity" article from 2KnowMySelf...

More tips on "stop taking things personally":

• Stop taking things personally - part 1 from Self Esteem Newsletter (Sept 2006)


• Stop Taking Things Personally - part 2 by Lisa Brown from Self Esteem

Recommended reading:
"What Happy Women Know: How New Findings in Positive Psychology Can Change Women's Lives for the Better" by Dan Baker (Author), Cathy Greenberg (Author), Ina Yalof (Author).

Being Judgemental

Today's ZenHabits' post talk about something that is quite applicable to me.
The post is titled "A Simple Method to Avoid Being Judgmental (yes, that means you!)". Psst... that TOTALLY means me!!!! :P

“Be curious, not judgmental.” - Walt Whitman
“I am grateful that I am not as judgmental as all those censorious, self-righteous people around me.” - Anonymous

I've always known that I'm rather judgmental.
I had no problem being judgmental.
Sometimes I even admit it quite happily.
I guess it could be because I grew up in an environment where everyone is judgmental.
The thing is - even though it's extremely easy to be judgmental (Leo - the author of the above post - agrees - he think it's human nature) - it's really not nice when you are being judged.

That is a lesson that I've learnt recently by experiencing the following:
When I am not doing anything wrong, I'm being judged for not doing anything.
When I'm trying to do things right, I'm being judged for not doing it right at one go.
Do 10 things right, they fly by unacknowledged;
Do 1 thing wrong, it is drilled to microscopic level.

Well - what can one do?

Luckily for me - having been on both sides now - I know that there is no point in pointing out to the person being judgmental that they're not helping the situation by judging everything.

In the past, whenever I have a not-so-nice habit/behaviour that affects others - I find that more often that not - the reason I change is because I've realised how it felt to be on the receiver end of the behaviour. It's a little dumb to wait until I have experienced the "pinch" before I change.
But I find this is a quite common behaviour amongst people who do not know better.

I'm not saying to judge the other person back so that they learn the lesson. (In which case it wouldn't work anyway - cause once they have started judging you; your judgement no longer has weight to them. :P)
What I meant is more that life experiences will normally help us in being less and less judgmental.
Reading something like the above article definitely will not hurt too.
Leo reckons we should all start by being aware when we're being judgmental and move from there (see Leo's DUAL method mentioned).

Leo also said "... I don’t think it’s always useful to us. We look down on others, as if we are so much better … and that creates division between people."

As with many other things - realizing and admitting that what we are doing something that is not-so-nice - is the first step to improvement...

Pink Piggies

Dedicated to my li'l sis:
from "Pink Piggy Appeal Day @ NAB"

Blog Template Update Dilemma

Yup... I am once again in the search for the right blogger template...

I really like my current template. How can I not? It's SOOOOOO pretty!
But ... (of course there is a but - why else would I be looking for a new template?) :P
I would also really like to have the posts count visible for each Archive period; see highlighted below in red box.The above screen shot is off "Fleur" template offered by BlogCrowds.

Along with that, I would also love to have category / label clouds, as per featured below.
The above screen shot is off "BlogU"- which discuss topics on how to personalized your blog. Sample articles below:

• My Category Cloud Finally


• Peek-a-Boo NavBar

The author, Annie also has another very pretty blog called ButterMilkClouds

Anyway - the Classic Blogger Template do not have template tag for post-count (as far as I know).. Pssst... I'm very happy to be proven wrong for this! It also does not directly support Category Clouds - though I could possibly do it through del.i.cio.us - it won't be as fun!

Sigh... dilemma dilemma dilemma.

One thing I know for sure, pipi will be happy if I decided to change my template! :P

I've got couple options in mind... but none as suited to me as this one yet!

• Fleur - BlogCrowds


• Summer Love - BlogCrowds


• Free Templates - Final Sense


• Blue Flowers - FreeSkins


• Pink Scrolls - FreeSkins


• Decayed - CSS Design Template


• Beautiful Day - CSS Design Template

Also, this post claims to have 3000 over blogger templates - might be worth checking out. Plus Blogger Templates and BlogFlux also looks interesting..

Cheerios!

Steve Pavlina's Interesting Thoughts

In January 2006, Steve Pavlina talked about Understanding Family Relationship Problems. I find some points that he made in this post extremely relate-able. Thought I do wish there is a clearer line between right and wrong instead of it being a choice. Snippets below...

For example, consider a problematic relationship between yourself and another family member. Suppose you hold the belief that you must be close to every family member simply because they’re related to you. Perhaps you’d never tolerate this person’s behavior if it came from a stranger, but if the person is a relative, then you tolerate it out of a sense of duty, obligation, or your personal concept of family. To push a family member out of your life might cause you to feel guilty, or it could lead to a backlash from other family members. But genuinely ask yourself, “Would I tolerate this behavior from a total stranger? Why do I tolerate it from a family member then?” Exactly why have you chosen to continue the relationship instead of simply kicking the person out of your life? What are the beliefs that perpetuate the problematic relationship? And are those beliefs really true for you?
...
If you operate under the belief that family is forever and that you must remain loyal to all your relatives and spend lots of time with them, I want you to know that those beliefs are your choice, and you’re free to embrace them or release them. If you’re fortunate enough to have a close family that is genuinely supportive of the person you’re becoming, that’s wonderful, and in that situation, you’ll likely find the closeness of your family to be a tremendous source of strength. Then your loyalty to family closeness will likely be very empowering.

He also advices that to have a Soulful Relationships; we need to change our mindset about people.

"Everyone you meet in your life — even total strangers — is already intimately connected to you. The idea that we are all separate and distinct beings is nothing but an illusion. We are all parts of a larger whole, like individual cells in a body."

In April 2006, he blogged about Self-Acceptance vs. Personal Growth. His thought on the topic seems very logical yet foreign at the same time to me. I'm so used to measuring everything. What do we have inside of us? Refer some snippets below...

Why does there seem to be a conflict between self-acceptance and growth anyway? I think the conflict is actually a result of a particular mindset. I’ll refer to it as the linear mindset.
...
Trying to apply the linear mindset to your self-image creates the conflict between self-acceptance and growth. Instead of merely measuring various aspects of your life and noting how they change over time, you identify with them.
...
Instead of rooting your sense of self in your position, which is changeable, what would happen if you rooted your sense of self in something permanent and unchangeable? Stop identifying yourself with any form of positional status, and pick something invulnerable instead… like a pure concept that nothing in this world can touch. Examples include unconditional love, service to humanity, faith in a higher power, compassion, nonviolence, and so on.
...
What I’m really getting at here is inner peace. When you keep your sense of self away from third-dimensional positions, your position can rollercoaster all over the place, and you can still be at peace on the inside no matter what happens. You don’t have to withdraw and be totally passive. You can enjoy being an ambitious overachiever and set and achieve goals like a maniac — and have a great time doing it. But meanwhile you don’t seek your identity in those fluctuating outcomes.

Moreover, if you are like me - lost in the middle of the hectic modern life and uncertain of your life direction - these links below (Special Thanks to Shanon :P) could be useful:

• How to discover your life purpose in about 20 minutes (Jan 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: Intro (Jun 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: How Shall We Live? (Jun 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: Discover Your Purpose (Jun 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: From Purpose to Action (Jun 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: Transitioning (Jun 2005)


• The Meaning of Life: Conscious Evolution (Jun 2005)


• Levels of Consciousness (Apr 2005)


• Are You a Lightworker or a Darkworker? (Mar 2007)


• Darkworkers, Lightworkers, and Levels of Consciousness (Mar 2007)

"Four Profound Agreements" by Don Miguel Ruiz

“Life is like dancing. If we have a big floor, many people will dance. Some will get angry when the rhythm changes. But life is changing all the time.”
- Don Miguel Ruiz

The relevant definition of "Profound" (from WordNet Search):
(adj) fundamental, profound (far-reaching and thoroughgoing in effect especially on the nature of something) "the fundamental revolution in human values that has occurred"; "the book underwent fundamental changes"; "committed the fundamental error of confusing spending with extravagance"; "profound social changes"

The four simple yet profound agreements which can be used as important tools on the path to personal freedom are:

1. Be impeccable with your word. *
"Therefore, to put another down or project negative words or energy towards another person, is to lash out at the other person because of our own insecurities."

2. Don’t take anything personally. *
"What anybody thinks about you, or says about you, is really about them."

3. Don’t make assumptions. *
"And not only do we believe our assumptions about what other people are thinking, but then we end up taking those assumptions personally and even end up resenting the person."

4. Always do your best.
"Agree to always do your best, with love and acceptance for the imperfect divine human that you are."

Taken from Four Profound Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz at RirianProject; which refers to The Four Agreements, a famous book by Don Miguel Ruiz.

* Might be an extremely good advice for someone like me...

For All the Sleep-Deprived People...

Here's a few interesting links to article about "sleep":

• 11 Ways to Sleep Better [RirianProject]


• Top 10 Ways to Sleep Smarter and Better [LifeHacker]


• Reprogram your sleep patterns [LifeHacker]


• 10 foods for a good night's sleep [LifeHacker]


• 9 Little Known Ways To Sleep So It Counts [RirianProject]


• 6 Sleep Tips [LifeHack.org]


• 8 Tools For 8 Hours Of Energy-Boosting Sleep [RirianProject]


• How to Sleep More Effectively, Starting Tonight [RirianProject]

When all of the above doesn't work, I would recommend resort to cuddles :P

Dedicated to my special someone...

Several "Better Photography in 60 Seconds" Tips

For quite a lot of people, photography is something that you can't help but be engaged in to a certain level.. Scenery while traveling, family occasions, friends gatherings, new home - they all scream "Take Pictures!!!" - well, they do to me (I hope that's normal)...

That's why I reckon this link from idigitalphoto could come in handy:
Improve Your Photos in 60 Seconds.

It has tips on various categories; i.e. Light; Landscaping; People; Color; Composition; Being Ready.

Hope you find it useful!

Another haircut :)

"How Much Is Enough? The Nature Of Fulfillment"

This post is inspired by the "Your Money Or Your Life: How Much Is Enough? The Nature Of Fulfillment" post from The Simple Dollar.

As per stated in the above post, the questions below are taken from the "How Much Is Enough? The Nature Of Fulfillment" chapter of the "Your Money or Your Life" book (refer pg 113 - 128 in paperback version of the book).

Q: What did you want to be when you grew up?
A: Profession wise; I remember it constantly changes.
As a kid - I have gone through phases wanting to be a teacher (so that I get to give out homeworks and punishments :P); an architect; a pilot; a business-woman in suits that has her own office in a sky-craper.
When I was introduced to computer; programming attracts me big time (my Mathematical skill helps). So, I went through high school year wanting to be a nerdy programmer that works day and night; wears t-shirt and jeans; eat junk food and drink Coke Zero all the time.
Now that I'm working as a "Software Consultant" in a tall bank building (private office not included) - I want to be an interior designer; or an event organizer; or a magazine-writer; or maybe I secretly still want to ben intelligent casual programmer.
Personally though; I've always wanted to be an always-well-groomed and pretty-looking lady with easy-going personality that successfully charmed people each and every time with her loveliness. (Yes, go and laugh out loud - just make sure I'm not around! :P)

Q: What have you always wanted to do that you haven’t yet done?
A: I would love to try living in another city (New York preferably) and start building my own life from scratch - doing the things that I want to do and avoid the things that I should do but do not enjoy doing as much as possible.
I would also love to travel around the world with a great companion.

Q: What have you done in your life that you’re really proud of?
A: Not sure - I guess it could be my thesis (which content I don't remember anymore); or maybe of my work life (which I'm a little bored of atm).
Geez - I really don't know what I'm really proud of at this stage - will come back to this question some other time when I have something more to be proud of.
Mmm... I'm rather proud of myself. Of my decisions (lately). Of the things that I do (to a certain point). Actually... I know! I am VERY proud of the people around me. They're everything that I have. My family; my 'companion' and my close friends. I'm VERY.. VERY proud of them. They're the best of the best!

Q: If you knew you were going to die within a year, how would you spend that year?
A: I would spend as much time as I could with my family, beau and close friends - travelling around the world; see and try as much things as I can.
Mmmm.. and maybe get 'hitch'-ed? :P

Psst... I will also try to lose weight - I want to die slim! hahaha :P

Q: What brings you the most fulfillment - and how is that related to money?
A: Programming used to bring me MOST fulfillment. The joy of completing a piece of program. The proud feeling I get by looking at my pretty and neat code that knows how to do 'one thing' very well. The "IHHHHHH - GEMES!" (pardon the Indo) feeling that I get when debugging a problem in my program - that follows with the sense of accomplishment when the problem is solved. Technically, this should be the one thing that's earning me money - and it is; but it's not like what I imagined it to be. (+ $$$)
Travelling (with the right people) also gives me a big fulfillment. It costs money - sometimes big pile of it. (- $$$)
Lastly, looking at my balanced accounts through Microsoft Money in my well-organized laptop (even more so when I have $$$ in my Savings account). Mmm.. It is about money and being organized... :P (? $$$)
Learning something new - always gives me big fulfillment. Most of the time; it costs money. (- $$$)

Q: If you didn’t have to work for a living, what would you do with your time?
A: Travel; Spend Time with My Family/Beau/Close-friends; Take Pictures; Read; Browsing House Magazines; Try New Things and Blog about Them.

Q: How do you answer these questions?
A: I'm not very sure what is the answer to this question. But I'll try - I guess I answered the above questions as honest as I can. I like the questions. They're very interesting and they dig out a few things that I have forgotten.

P.S.: Thanks for the correction on 'hitch'-ed, darling!

"The Weirdest Insects in the World"

Euw...

I don't quite understand why on earth I feel the urge to check out this article; considering that I find these creatures extremely yucky. Yucky may even be an understatement... In fact, they could be considered the main feature of my nightmares.

Anyway - for those of you who might be interested... check out this Digg link below!
http://www.neatorama.com/2007/10/08/the-weirdest-insects-in-the-world/

Melbourne Marathon 07 October 2007

The complete group photo:Feat: Dhaminda, me, Shanon, Bernie, Adam, Raf and baby Gali (L-R)

Check out other pictures at my Flickr Melb Marathon photo set... Also, more official pictures available here!

Yay - My finish time for the 5.5km Yarra Walk/Run was 00:44:54!!!

More info about the event here!

Financial Tips

Reality: "Every time you buy anything, you sacrifice a bit of your dreams."
-- posted by Trent @ The Simple Dollar

Find more facts in the 'Five Personal Finance Lessons That Rocked Me Like A Hurricane When I Figured Them Out' article...

Sample mistakes: "A windfall is something to use on a giant splurge."
-- posted by Trent @ The Simple Dollar

Taken from the 'The Bad Lessons My Parents Taught Me About Money - And How I Plan To Avoid Teaching Them To My Children' post.

Food Obsession: "Ultimate Cookie Recipe" and "Food Presentation" Weblinks

I ... am in search for the "Ultimate Cookie Recipe"!!!

Cookies are very appealing..
The smell of them (even the instant ones) in baking are amazing..
Up till now; walking past "Famous Amos" in Melbourne Central always tickle my nose with the yummy smell...

Here I got some links which reckon that their cookies recipes are one of the 'Ultimates'..

• Iron Chef's Steven's Ultimate Cookie


• The Ultimate Caramel Chocolate Pecan Pie


• The Ultimate Chocolate Brownie Cookie


• The Ultimate Chewy Oatmeal Cookie


• The Ultimate Cookie


• Ultimate Double Chocolate Cookies

Which one should I try first? :)))

On the *food-note*; I also have some links that talks bout "Food Presentation" below:

• Recipe Tips


• Living.OneIndia


• Suite 101

My 25th Bday Gathering Snapshots

Midnight Cake Celebration :P
-20th September 2007-

Dinner w the Gals @ KumDen :P
-23rd September 2007-

Family Dinner @ Ling Nam :)
-26th Sept 2007-

Bonus Pic:
Two scary monsters @ Max Brenners..
-26th Sept 2007-

My Bday Gifts This Year

Meet Scott and my new camera...
Thx Louisa, lek-but-yong and Shanon :P

Meet the cutesie Mino, Divina and Boris!!!
Thanks darling.. :)

Elly's Hand-picked tulips and Cou-Ni's Hand-made cake..
Thanks galz!! :))

Cou Ni's Hand-made Cake (Again?)
Well, it was Yummy and Pretty!!! Show some appreciation... :P

My Back Detox Voucher! :P
Thx my lovely gals...

How to Take a Compliment - LifeHack.org

Boo!

I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who needs to read this post..
"How to Take a Compliment".

*LOL* Hahaha...

Can't VS Won't

Found a very interesting title in my LifeHack.org feeds today;
"Say Won't Instead of Can't"...

Hmm .. I wonder where will this take me to ...

So, I quickly browsed the page and discovered that it leads to one interesting article;
"One Word that Can Change Your Reality and Really Piss Off Other People";
at SelfMadeChick.

Preview of the article below...

"The word that I almost completely removed from my vocabulary was “CAN’T” and the word I replaced it with was “WON’T.”
I’m telling you, this sounds so simple and perhaps inconsequential until you actually try it yourself."
...
You may find that you can in fact “buy that car” but may “choose not to” buy that car. This is much more empowering than you going around thinking that you CAN’T buy that car.
I’ve studied this phenomenon over the past 4-5 years and I’ve found that the more successful a person is, the less often they say the word can’t. Unsuccessful people use the word can’t constantly.

Will definitely give this a try...

At most, how much would you pay for dessert?

How about US$14,500 for the world's most expensive dessert; i.e. a serving of "Fortress Stilt Fisherman Indulgence" (picture below)?



The dessert, featuring a gold leaf Italian cassata flavoured with Irish cream, served with mango and pomegranate compote and Dom Perignon champagne sabayon - decorated with a chocolate carving of a fisherman clinging to a stilt -- an age-old local fishing practice -- and an 80-carat aquamarine stone, is currently offered in The Fortress Hotel in Galle, Sri Lanka.

Other pages that talk about this dessert:

• Taste.com.au


• Sri Lanka News


• Wealth Wonders


• CNN.com

I'm very much a dessert person (ask anyone who knows me) - but to justify spending US$14,500.00 on a dessert? I might need to get either insanely rich or actually insane!! :)