Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Further "After Thoughts"

I thought about the topic a bit more over lunch today. (Hmm.. I really like my alone lunch time. It's just so enjoyable to eat, think and read alone. Who would have thought I would say this - seeing that I was avoiding it for so long?) :P

Anyway - here's what I've deduced so far.

The life cycle of the people that I know generally goes about like this...

Born -> Raised, provided for and protected by parents/other family members while getting as much education as the parents can afford / the kids are willing to do -> Find a job -> Find a partner -> Get married & learn to support ourselves (financially) -> Have kids -> Raise, provide for and protect the kids..
... and the cycle continues except that it's now about the kids.

Sometimes people probably have to struggle quite a bit to complete this cycle within their given time frame. When that happens, completing the cycle then become the main focus of their life.

Take my parents for example. My dad didn't get to complete high school and he has to compete with others who has the advantage of completed university in providing the best life standard for his kids. My mom's life priority has always been about the family, and us, the kids. This - I know for a fact - has work extremely well for them. They've set their goals and they've definitely have achieved them well ahead of their time.

Then there are people like me.. who has cruise through the cycle and currently about half way in it but reluctant about moving on to the next step yet.

I realised that I'm very lucky to have the luxury of my parents' protection, their full attention and love (well - a quarter of a full I guess) and I really do appreciate what my parents have done for me. At the same time, they have the open mind of letting me choose what I want to do with life (while providing hints as often as possible).

But I'm still not ready to do the same for someone else - even if they're my kids. I want to achieve something that is just purely me before moving on to that step. I'm not saying that I can't do it with kids - I mean, I know many people who have - but surely there's a better chance of the achievement happening when my focus isn't diverged.

Now that I've deduced those facts out - where does it leave me?

Well - for one, I know that at the moment, I don't want my life to be about reproducing. It is not an achievement. Hmm.. pardon me. It is an achievement to be a great parents and have great kids. But I guess - that is not enough for the current me. I want to achieve something else before I go down that path...

Plus, there is this appreciation thing too. I actually feel that I should be able to achieve something even more because my parents have done so well in providing for me. They've helped me conserve so much energy and provided me with certain level of luxury throughout my life so that I should put them into something big. Something useful. Something meaningful.

Looking around, some people on my boat, have the "wealth accumulation = being successful" ingrained in them by their parents (through their own struggle towards financial freedom). I used to think that too - but it has somehow been stripped off me along the way. But I've come to the realisation that money isn't everything and wealth accumulation is over-rated. (Playing "Miami Nights: Singles in the City" will tell you that :P)

The question remains - what is this something else that I want to achieve? How do I go about in achieving them?

I know that staying where I am just because it is comfortable certainly wouldn't help me. Or would it?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

'I know that staying where I am just because it is comfortable certainly wouldn't help me. Or would it?' - Depends on what u think and how u think? Ahhhh... So basicly, if you love what u r doing and u prefer to do it for the rest of your life then there's nothing to think about anymore.... I don't know.. Maybe it is better to have a LIFE GUIDE!

ms s loveridge said...

if i love what i'm doing i won't be writing this post ya? :P
nah... life guide will make it boring :P