Friday, October 02, 2009

Good bye

It's definitely time to shed my skins.
I'm leaving this chapter and starting off a fresh new one.
Turning over a new leaf.

Thank you for your hospitality all along.
I had my big share of fun with this.
It is now time to grow up and wander to another world!

This is me - pressing my life reset button.
It's time.

Good bye.

Thursday, October 01, 2009

It isn't me.

The blog. This blog. Doesn't feel like me. Doesn't look like me.
But then again - maybe I just don't feel like myself.
Maybe it is not the blog. Maybe it is me.

I'm shedding my skin. I feel myself changing. I know I am changing.
I just don't know what am I becoming - which is very unsettling.
Is it for the better? Am I turning bad?

Odd... Out of place.
I want to disappear.

Melancholy

I feel odd.

Here - but not here.
Swimming - but not in the water.
Eating - but not tasting.

What's happening?

I'm observing my surrounding with curiosity.
I'm wondering what I love and what I hate with uncertainty.

Feeling a bit of the melancholia.
Feeling out of place - out of this world.

I feel odd.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Minimalism

I've been attracted to this for a while.

The feeling after a good decluttering session.
The feeling when you're living of just a box of luggage full of USEFUL things when you're on a long holiday.
The feeling that I get from having a clear idea as to where everything is at in the house.
These feelings are very difficult to beat.

I spent about 3 hours cleaning up my big pile of official paperworks yesterday.
Down to only the necessities now and feels very light.

The goal is to work it down to the minimum. :)
Only retain things that are necessary and useful - not clutters.
I've noticed that it is definitely much easier to appreciate and use all that I have when we're down to the minimum.

Intrinsic vs Extrinsic Goals

I read somewhere today that it is much better to work on intrinsic (inwardly) goals than on extrinsic goals, e.g. wealth, power and social acceptance. It makes me realise that I've been working on extrinsic goals all this time. It has come the time for me to work out what my Intrinsic Goals are.

I need to do this quick. So that I can then focus on working on my intrinsic goals...

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Photojojo Mania

I stumbled upon the Photojojo Store and they have some super cute items...


Fotoclips


The Super-Secret Spy Lens!


Magnetic Photo Rope


The Doodle Frame

This would probably make a really nice birthday idea *hint hint* :P

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

September...

I've always liked September.

It's the start of Spring time in Melbourne; hence the great weather.
People starts heading out.
Plus, it's the month of my birthday celebration. ;)

This year, it has been and will be an even more exciting time.

I'm moving on from my current job.
I've just moved in to our first owned home (with Shanon) - nesting heavily and loving it.
I'm feeling healthier than a month ago - though I still need to work on my food intake a bit more.
I'm discovering that life is really what you make of it.
So I'm going to make the most of it! ;)

I really like the following Zen Habits' posts:
- Work as Play
- The Minimalist Principle: Omit Needless Things

Loving September!

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Surprise!

Today - I came home to a lovely surprise!
-- Image taken from ai-junkie: Programming Game AI by Example.


No excuse now. Have to get it started and keep it going. ^.^
Currently reading the first chapter - refresher on Mathematics - really good. Reminds me of how interesting math is and how much fun learning can be. :)

.Mino loves Boris.

Friday, July 31, 2009

I'm on Top of the World!

At yoga today, I have just come into this really really big realisation that I was very scared of losing that I keep having to remind myself throughout the whole class. It's priceless. Seriously!

I am such a whinger. Whinge and don't act. I will change that.

I am extremely lucky and everything around me is great, if not amazing. I have an awesome husband who I love so so so very much, and love me back just as much (maybe a tiny weeny bit less - cause I love more! :P). I have an extraordinary family; kewl, fun, weird at times but just lovely. Plus, the friends and people that I have around me are just super great.

Yep yep - I know none of this is new realisation. I've said this before.
Then, what's new?

Well - today, I realise that... I'm great. Actually, scratch that, I'm AWESOME. Ha-ha. Yes. That's why my life is awesome!

But you know what - I'm going to make it even better. How?
By actively choosing what I want to do and skip those that holds no value for me.
No regrets. Life is too short for regrets.
I'm 26 turning 27. A full grown up with no financial issue or health issue or mental issue (or so I think :P).

The realisation brings me to think that - hey! I can do anything if I do want to do it enough. Why? Becoz - I am one very capable person with substantial intelligence. Better than average! (at least I think so :P) So you know what I'll do next? I will put my focus into learning and doing things related to AI. Why? Cause I can. Cause it's cool and interesting. Cause I can choose to do things that are cool and interesting! :P

Good nite!

Check out Google Wave Preview.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Taking Chances...

Be Brave.
Living The Best Life.
No Regrets.
Stop contemplating.
Just act on it.

The best tool in the world is not going to help anything or anyone if no one uses it.

Wikipedia: Artificial Intelligence

Check out - Google Wave Preview!

Monday, July 27, 2009

Realisation

In general, when I rate myself or how I do things - I compare up. I aim to be better. I wonder why I'm not as good as "X" or "Y". That's the weirdly miniscule competitive side of me. I don't go crazy over trying to win something - but when I do compare - I definitely look up. Some people look down. They look at others who do worse than them and think that they're good for not doing as bad as the others. Which is fine, I suppose. But not as good, I think. I mean - they'll be less likely to improve. Maybe it's just a preference thing.

But - this whole new curly hair thing has definitely taught me something new.

I have to be very careful when I look up or compare up. Who am I comparing myself with? Is this someone that is directly above me or diagonally above me? *LOL* I'll probably lose you soon. It's a bit tricky to explain - or maybe it's just my crazy brain. But, for example, as a straight hair lady who just had her hair permed - I should not go about comparing my hair with a naturally curly hair lady. She has been dealing with her hair since she was a teenager. Just like how well I know my hair and how best to style it. Obviously, her hair will look better.

I'm struggling with this new hairstyle. I should have just stick with my nicely straight hair and learn to curl it with that straightening iron thing (if you're confused - don't be - the new way to curl your hair is with straightening iron, it comes out prettier than with curling iron :P)!!

Anyway - lesson learnt! Next time, I should work and do my best with what I've got before starting at level 0 with something new. I was already at level 60 or 70 with styling my straight hair! Now I have to start at level 0 again! Hmphhh!!!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

My New Hair Style

My Hair Before:

Aim: If lucky, or or

My Hair Now:

Hmmm....? *bingung*

Thursday, July 23, 2009

The Importance of Treating Yourself Well

After focusing very hard for about a year to lose weight - I find myself slowly gaining it back.
Thankfully - not yet all - but a few days ago I reached an "Oh No" moment.
I've nearly gained back half of the weight I've lost. ARGH!

So - before all my effort goes to waste - I decided to do something about it. AGAIN!
But - this time - I know that I'll do better. Why?
Because I have done this before. I know the drill.
I also know that there are some flaws from what I used to do.
I will have to fix it and keep refining the process.

Since that "Oh No" moment - I've controlled my eating again.
I haven't been as strict as I was - but I'm slowly curbing it.
The idea is doing it slowly so that instead of feeling deprived - I ease myself into the process and make sure this time - I'm going to be altering my eating habit PERMANENTLY.
Not as a temporary diet thing (which causes the weight gain afterwards).

Starting with breakfast. Instead of limiting myself to one choice - I organized a few options with similar amount of calories.
Why? Because different situations calls for different type of food. I also get easily bored with one option. Plus, constraints often calls for big slip ups. I've got Up&Go, Oats, Ultra Slim Milk, and Soy Yogurt lined up. :)

Next, hydration. Water. It's VERY VERY VERY VERY important. It helps with my "regularity" and also kept me from over-eating (eating when I'm thirsty). So I make sure that I fill my 750ml bottle of water as soon as I get to work. Keep drinking it.

On to lunch - as with brekkie - I've lined up a few options. Canned soup with some crackers, Bowl of mixed salad, 2 Sushi rolls, Subway Tuna Sub and this Chicken Avocado Sundried Tomato Tortilla Wrap thing. Yum! I'll probably leave Friday as open planned.

Bought some snack options too - < 100 calorie muesli bar, apples, soy yogurt and ryvita.

Dinner is a bit tricky to restrict - at the end of the day I like to have an enjoyable meal and it also depend on my mood... But - I'll work on cooking at home more. Much healthier and controllable. :)

Will also put more effort in continuing my 3x Yoga a week.

It's funny. I do feel like how come I can't just let go and enjoy.. but the truth is - when I just let go - I don't actually enjoy... Little treats, eating out, muffin breakfast, brunches, are only enjoyable when it's occasional. Not routine. :)
It's true. I'm not making it up. Because since I watch myself more the past few days - I feel so much better. Seriously. I feel in control. I feel great. I deserve to feel great cause I'm doing great.

Good Nite!

Monday, July 20, 2009

Job Satisfaction Can Reduce Excessive Spending, Debt

Job Satisfaction Can Reduce Excessive Spending, Debt

It is true.

It's very difficult to control yourself and be discipline when you're not happy 8 hours a day (or more some days). I have to do something. Soon. Very soon.

I can't keep going on with my stress eating, stress buying, and wait for weekends to arrive. My stress eating makes me happy cause I'm putting on weight. Every time I decide to stop over-eating, I go back to work and all that decision goes to bin. I just got back from a holiday and am already thinking of taking off days. That's just not the way it's supposed to be.

I want my happiness back!

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Picking a D-SLR

It's definitely not like picking an apple! :P

But - if you are lucky enough to be choosing which D-SLR to buy; here's a couple links that I've found very informative...
* Digital SLR Guide: How to pick a digital SLR camera
* Digital Photography Review

Can't wait to get my hands on my very own D-SLR! Will it be Nikon D60, Nikon D5000, Nikon D90, or Canon 450D??? Don't know yet! Will play around with all four of those @ Ted's on Saturday and find out!

Cheerio,
One very excited soon-to-be D-SLR owner. Yay!

Saturday, May 09, 2009

believe

Tequila and Salt

-- received from Louisa --
This should probably be taped to your bathroom mirror where one could read it every day. You may not realize it, but it's 100% true.

1. There are at least two people in this world that you would die for.

2. At least 15 people in this world love you in some way.

3. The only reason anyone would ever hate you is because they want to be just like you.

4. A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you.

5. Every night, SOMEONE thinks about you before they go to sleep.

6. You mean the world to someone.

7. You are special and unique.

8. Someone that you don't even know exists loves you.

9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes from it.

10. When you think the world has turned its back on you, take another look.

11. Always remember the compliments you received. Forget about the rude remarks.

So ...
If you are a loving friend, send this to everyone, including the one that sent it to you.
If you get it back, then they really do love you.

And always remember ...
"When life hands you Lemons, ask for Tequila and Salt and call me over!"

I've actually given up on forwards a while ago to the point where I generally just delete email forwards. But, I do really like the last sentence *LOL*, plus it was from Louisa. :)

"Louisa, there goes... I really do love you. :) Then again, it's hard to not love you, cause you're one very lovable gal. :) Be sure to stay that way! (HUGS)"

Personally, I only agree with the ones I've bold-ed. Here's some further comments...
#2: I don't actually like the use of a certain number - why 15? But agree with the idea of there are more than a handful of people who loves me. Surely there is! :P).
#6: I prefer to think that I mean the WORLD to more than someone! :P
#8: It's a little creepy isn't it?
#9: If you think it's not true, then you need to make it true. Learn from your mistake!
#10: The world is round. It can't turn its back on anything. There is now front or back. :P
#11: Hmm.. Actually, don't forget the rude remarks; just strip it off! Don't take the delivery method personally. Find the actual message of how you can be better. If it comes from someone close, try and understand why it's been delivered that way. Even better, explain to them that they could probably work on the delivery method. :)

Tuesday, May 05, 2009

Quarter Life Reset Button

Looking at how I spend my time, some of the things that I do or feel out of habit are pretty silly. But I guess it is how it is. I mean if I think of myself as a program, it's only normal that after almost 27 years of continuously running I am quite lacking in efficiency - which is the issue here. I've got too many little useless background tasks that needs trimming or even idle processes (or zombies).

So - I'm pressing the RESET button! I'm so excited!

I've noticed lately that I'm at the happiest when I'm doing things, when I'm busy, when I've got deadline to meet. Basically when I feel productive. I love it! I don't have time to think about useless dragging my self down thoughts. Hmm.. I probably should fix my head and learn to stop those dragging-me-down thoughts. But at the same time, just doing things work too. Surely it's more difficult to get those dragging-me-down thoughts when I have achieve some sense of accomplishment.

Lately I've been lacking that sense of accomplishment. Time to make it happen.

I've got a few things I can do and want to do.

Step 1: De-cluttering. Sort out my priorities. Throw out old useless / meaningless routines that are mere habits. Use the time to do things that have meaning or useful for me!.

I shall put my focus and attention on spending what little time I have on things that I "enjoy doing" or "need to do". For example:
* I need to control my eating habit - for health and cause I care about how I feel and look.
* I need to do and enjoy doing yoga - cause it keeps me sane and happy.
* I need to work - for money.
* I need to find something that I enjoy to do for work - so my days become better.
* I enjoy taking photos.
* I need to find a home with my hubby - and this will also attribute to my contentment level.
* I need to cook at home more - because this helps me appreciate the eating out more and helps my eating habit in check. Plus, I enjoy it too.
* I enjoy eating out and love catching up with friends n my siblings, I can join these two together :)
* I love getting massages - so I've decided that this will be my splurge / indulgence from now on.
* etc etc ...

I am going to stop doing the habitual should dos that are basically just time sink. I mean, come to think of it, I now only look at my money thing about 1-2 times a week. It's pretty great considering I used to spend half an hour everyday on it (what a waste of time).

Step 2: The other thing that I've noticed is the important of "positive thoughts". I have the tendency to think that the "glass half empty". It's not all that bad except that this pessimism doesn't go very well with my insecurity issue. It creates this big loop full of jumps from pessimism to insecurity to pessimism to insecurity (am I making sense?). Oh well - anyway - I find that when I'm happy, I'm more likely to be productive which leads to sense of accomplishment, which then makes me happy and makes me want to do even more things. So - time to think happy thoughts. After all, I have such great life. Full of amazing and loving people. Full of opportunity. Great things. Nothing really to put me down. ^.^

Step 3: Stop procrastinating! Just do. I'm shedding my piles. For the next month, I'll do whatever I have in my pile. I'm putting deadline to all those books and papers. They need to be done by 5th June or they're gone from the pile. I'm doing it. If I actually care and want to do them, they'll be done by then. Doing it! Doing it! Doing it!

Whoa! I feel like a train with full steam ahead but can't go anywhere cause I'm still chain to my desk. :P LOL - but it's OK - I'll use this steam to clean up my work to do list. I'm doing it.

Darling, GAMBATTE with the Lit. Review! Love you so much!

Monday, May 04, 2009

Splurges vs Habits

Last week I talk about how to keep enjoying indulgences. Found this article on The Simple Dollar that's definitely relevant and worth reading.

The Simple Dollar » Splurges, Habits, and Projection

In short,
"A splurge is healthy every once in a while. It’s an irregular expense - not one that you spend money on every day or even every week. It also fills you with joy when you do it - and you still feel happy about it a day later. In short, you derive quality of life from that purchase.

A habit is never healthy. When an experience (particularly one tied to spending) becomes routine and normal, it should either fulfill a basic need in a simple way or it should be reconsidered.

...

The difficulty for many people is that splurges become habits without the person realizing it.

I like!

Problem Solving

Issue: "I start or want to do all sorts of tasks / things / projects but don't finish them!"
Priority: HIGH
Life Impact: Major

OK - I'm sick of this. I have a big pile of things sitting on my desk at home waiting for me to do it. I have a long list of to-do things in my mobile always waiting for me to action on. I have a few emails in my mailbox waiting to be replied to. I have a very pretty and constantly growing Excel spreadsheet at work consisting of things I need / would like to do.

Bleh!!!! Nooooooo!!!

Action: "Stop Procrastinating! Just DO!"

"I Don't Know" vs "I'll Find Out"

Have a read at this article from Zen Habits, "Are These Three Words Ruining Your Life?".

This is so applicable to me at the moment.

I keep saying "I don't know" what I would love or like to do for a living. The fact is if I keep saying this, I will never know.

It's time to change it to "I will find out" what I want to do instead of waiting and hoping for it to fall on my lap (in a million years time).

Monday, April 27, 2009

Indulgence

Roughly 10 months ago I made a decision to do something about my weight issue. I begin to control my food intake and consciously doing activities that will burn more energy. It's definitely a very steep learning curve for me and I'm still struggling.

Lately, I noticed that I've slowly slipped back to my old habit of being controlled by my taste buds instead of my brain. I eat and eat and eat even though I don't need it or know that I shouldn't. Thankfully the knowledge that I gained throughout the learning process isn't all wasted. I now have a voice in the back of my mind that reminds me the cost of over eating and the hard work I've put in to get where I am now. Hmm.. But I probably have to say, the voice is not loud enough to stop me from indulging every now and then (a bit too often lately). :P

Not to worry though cause I've just been introduced to the destroyer of indulgence; i.e. overindulgence.

I've been grabbing brekky on my way to work almost daily the past month or so. Muffins, Bircher Muesli, Fruit Toasts, Raisin Toasts. Plus a cup of skinny latte. Yummm...

But last Friday, I gobble down the muffin and feels unsatisfied. The muffin just wasn't rich enough anymore. It no longer feels like an indulgence. D*mn! Sigh... The very thing that ruins the taste and memory of muffins or raisin toast or a delightful brunch is having them daily.

I'm going back to basic. Loaf of bread with jam for brekky. Something standard. Something plain. So that when I go out for brunch on Saturday; they feel luxurious, divine and scrumptious..

Monday Life Lesson: "Nothing destroy an indulgence as fast as overindulgence."

Sunday, April 26, 2009

100% Effort, Coffee, and Beluga Whale

I don't normally run after tram/train. I am not a runner. It annoys me too much to miss the tram/train when I've put the effort into trying to catch it. Plus, there is the embarrassment of having the tram/train door closed on me; so I choose not to try. It's a choice I've made and have been comfortable with.

But today, I was left home a little late for the 10 a.m. Bikram Yoga class. Somewhere along Chapel St; I saw the tram coming my direction; I was half relieved and half annoyed. I was 3 blocks away from the next tram stop and the tram was a block behind me. Grr...!!!!

Somehow, I decide to do something different! I run... sprint like crazy to race the train/tram... and I caught the tram!!! Yayyyyyyyyyyyy! :) It feels EXTREMELY good to put in the effort and get the result - which brings me to think that I should perhaps revisit my original choice. Think about all the time I could save by just trying to catch the train/tram and caught it; even if I do miss and get embarrass sometime (as long as I don't trip!).

Next topic - coffee. I wasn't a coffee drinker. Somewhere along the way - I've become addicted to the foamy skinny latte in a takeaway Styrofoam cup from cafe. It's against my money principles though. It's crazy to spend about $3 every day for a cup of skinny latte. That means in a month I've thrown away $90!!! I could go and get 1.5 hour massage. Grrrr... I'm annoyed! But at the same time, I am starting to enjoy the taste of it. Combined with muffin or friand. Yumm... definitely makes my mornings better. Is it worth the expense though? Is it comparable to 1.5 hour massage monthly? For now, I think it is... :P

Hmm.. I stumbled upon this web page; The world's amazing animals | NEWS.com.au and it reminds me of the Beluga Whale that I intended to see during my recent New York trip. Sadly, I found out that Marina, the Beluga Whale in Coney Island had died in late 2007 (news).
(Picture taken from China Picture Moment : Beluga Whale Kiss.)

(Picture taken from THE BELUGA WHALE.)

Aren't they super cute? I want to see the real thing before they extinct...

Monday, April 20, 2009

Monday Reminder: Be Conscious of YOUR Life Values...

Jonathan Mead contributed a great reminder post at ZenHabits yesterday, "How to Become a Late Riser | Zen Habits". The title definitely intrigues me. It isn't something that I'd normally expect to find in a Personal Development website. But then again - ZenHabits isn't just a normal Personal Development site. It's one of the better ones! :)

The reminder?

"Do NOT live by someone else's values!" (More about it at "Are You Trying to Live Up to Other People’s Values?").

I'm sure we've all done this mistake at some point in life. Well, I'm definitely prone to this. It's easy to get carried away and excited by someone else's success stories and think that we want the same thing.

I will start practising the tips from the post on to my gigantic things-to-achieve-list, "Set my goals consciously."

How well do you know yourself?

How well do you know yourself?

Me? I'm as confused as ever. ^.^

Over the past couple years, I have changed in many ways. My mind definitely has grown. Weirdly, though in general my life hasn't been as simple as it used to be; there are some parts of it which has become much simpler. Overall, the changes are for the better. But there are changes that I'm still not certain about its purpose.

Now, focusing on the improvement type changes; I know that there are still many ways for me to be better and many more challenges I'd like to overcome. Plus, plenty other things I'd like to achieve.

Time has always been my enemy. As my friends and family would testify, I'm often heard complaining about time. The 24-hour day is not long enough. The 2-days weekend totally does not compensate for the 40-working-hour a week. Strangely, I even at rare occasion complain about the 40-working-hour being not enough.

At the same time, I often waste my time doing mindless web-browsing, reading silly girlie book that makes me blush when I get asked about, or just wallowing over things. Yes - I am the very definition of procrastinator.

Shanon got me to listen to this talk on Ted by a guy called Tim Ferriss, titled "How to Feel Like the Incredible Hulk". During the talk, Tim passed on two important and major lessons to me.

First in the order of the topic being discussed in the talk was, Distinction: Effective Vs. Efficient. It might sound very much the same thing, but they are different.

The definition of effective is "having an intended or expected effect" or "producing a strong impression or response; striking" (The Free Dictionary). Efficient, is defined as "working or producing effectively without wasting effort, energy, or money" (The Free Dictionary).

Now, which is better? It all depends on the task. How often will you be doing the task in hand? If it's something that you'll have to do over and over again, it makes sense to think, plan and try to do it as efficient as possible. If, however, it is something that you will only get to do once or twice, you might want to do it effectively.

Keeping in mind that we probably won't get to make an impact as many times as we'd like; I dare say that - for the important and grand tasks - go with effective! :)

Second, the Parkinson's Law (wikipedia) states that:
"Work expands so as to fill the time alloted to it."

In doing things, we seem to always be able to create sufficient complexity to fill the need for complexity.

Oddly, this has just come to my realisation quite recently. I suppose, it's a really good coincidence for imprinting this useful knowledge on to my weak memory. Make deadline! Hmm.. as if life span is not deadline enough. :)

I know - and keep reminding myself - life is short. I need to get in action. Soon. No - scratch that. NOW!

Speaking of "now", I've been intrigued by the "The Power of Now" and the "4-Hour Work Week" (which happened to be written by Tim Ferriss!) books. I'll put them on my reading list. Though judging by the speed at which I'm reading the "What Colour is Your Parachute?" book, I'm not quite sure when they will actually be read. Tsk Tsk Tsk. What a procrastinator.

Last note before I go to bed, I hereby testify that lists are procrastinator's best friends.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Lululemon Athletica Quotes

I've been doing Bikram Yoga for a while and I noticed that most of the regular yogis (including the instructors) wear Lululemon Athletica apparels in the class. I've always wondered why. ^.^

Curiosity got the better of me. I went into the store and bought one of their shorts during the Easter Break. I'll see how I go and report back (if I remember, that is). However - I gotta admit, I admire the service they provide. It's almost worth paying the $34 for the yoga shorts (already on sale!). They offer community activities (Girls Dancing Night, Free Yoga, etc etc). The shorts was packed in a very nice looking cool and big reusable bag (see image below - taken from luluLemon bag With Cool Quotes On It |).
It wasn't exactly like this one - I think it's the new design - but still - just as nice, if not nicer. :)

Their quotes are highly inspiring. They write it all over the store. They give out posters and postcards with the quotes printed on them.

I particularly like these quotes...
* Choose a positive thought. Stress is related to 99% of all illness.
* That which matters the most should never give way to that which matters the least.
* Life is full of setbacks. Success is determined by how you handle setbacks.
* Jealousy works the opposite way you want it to.
* Do one thing a day that scares you.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Some words of wisdom...






... from American Museum of Natural History.
- 31st December 2008, NYC -

Friday, April 03, 2009

Action Steps

I talked to this very wise and smart man last night about my new found problem while enjoying the sunset in St Kilda (gorgeous views!).

Here's some action steps for me over the next month...

Research
I need to find out what I want to do. Is there something that particularly have meaning for me? Or is there something that I really enjoy doing and will continue to enjoy for a while?
Action: Read "What Colour Is Your Parachute?"...

Once I sort that out - it'll be easier to solve the issue. Cause the next step will then be another research, i.e. to figure out how to get myself in that position. :)

I really gotta get my act together if I don't want to be stuck here.

Enough said.

PS: Another topic altogether, I'm wondering if I should get an SLR or a new PDA phone with that $900 from Kevin Rudd.. :P What do you think?

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Continuous Conundrum

I'm not sure if it's really me or it's by the influence of people around me or something else.
I don't feel right for my job anymore.
I'm constantly hanging at the edge in business conversation and I don't understand or care about what's going on at work.
I don't think this is my world at all.

Have I ever care? Has it ever been my world?

I'm not too sure.
I guess I care about little parts of it (the stuffs that I'm working on and the people that I interact with).
But seeing the amount of care that other people have, it makes me wonder if it's right that I don't have that type of care.
Then again - I was never a business/politics person.
I'm not interested in who's managing what and who's being moved to what role.
Names always fly through my head.

I guess it was never a problem in the past because I haven't really see the big picture of where I am in this little corporation world and where I am going.
Now that I can see that I'm not in the right world - can I ignore it and just continue along this path?
Keep doing what I do and try to pretend to care as per requirement about this world?
Doesn't that mean that I'm going to have to stay in this spot because really - I don't have a destination in this world?

On the other hand - I don't know what world I do have destination in...

Maybe I should move to Little Big Planet. :P

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Writing As A Career?

It's tempting.. :P Is it a possible thing? Am I good enough? Is my material worth people's reading effort? :P

OK - I'm giggling from the thought. So it surely isn't a good idea. :P

But - it sure sounds like a lot of fun.. Writing for a magazine. Or taking photos for a magazine. I'd love that type of work. But - somehow I don't think I am able to do it. Or do I?

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Further "After Thoughts"

I thought about the topic a bit more over lunch today. (Hmm.. I really like my alone lunch time. It's just so enjoyable to eat, think and read alone. Who would have thought I would say this - seeing that I was avoiding it for so long?) :P

Anyway - here's what I've deduced so far.

The life cycle of the people that I know generally goes about like this...

Born -> Raised, provided for and protected by parents/other family members while getting as much education as the parents can afford / the kids are willing to do -> Find a job -> Find a partner -> Get married & learn to support ourselves (financially) -> Have kids -> Raise, provide for and protect the kids..
... and the cycle continues except that it's now about the kids.

Sometimes people probably have to struggle quite a bit to complete this cycle within their given time frame. When that happens, completing the cycle then become the main focus of their life.

Take my parents for example. My dad didn't get to complete high school and he has to compete with others who has the advantage of completed university in providing the best life standard for his kids. My mom's life priority has always been about the family, and us, the kids. This - I know for a fact - has work extremely well for them. They've set their goals and they've definitely have achieved them well ahead of their time.

Then there are people like me.. who has cruise through the cycle and currently about half way in it but reluctant about moving on to the next step yet.

I realised that I'm very lucky to have the luxury of my parents' protection, their full attention and love (well - a quarter of a full I guess) and I really do appreciate what my parents have done for me. At the same time, they have the open mind of letting me choose what I want to do with life (while providing hints as often as possible).

But I'm still not ready to do the same for someone else - even if they're my kids. I want to achieve something that is just purely me before moving on to that step. I'm not saying that I can't do it with kids - I mean, I know many people who have - but surely there's a better chance of the achievement happening when my focus isn't diverged.

Now that I've deduced those facts out - where does it leave me?

Well - for one, I know that at the moment, I don't want my life to be about reproducing. It is not an achievement. Hmm.. pardon me. It is an achievement to be a great parents and have great kids. But I guess - that is not enough for the current me. I want to achieve something else before I go down that path...

Plus, there is this appreciation thing too. I actually feel that I should be able to achieve something even more because my parents have done so well in providing for me. They've helped me conserve so much energy and provided me with certain level of luxury throughout my life so that I should put them into something big. Something useful. Something meaningful.

Looking around, some people on my boat, have the "wealth accumulation = being successful" ingrained in them by their parents (through their own struggle towards financial freedom). I used to think that too - but it has somehow been stripped off me along the way. But I've come to the realisation that money isn't everything and wealth accumulation is over-rated. (Playing "Miami Nights: Singles in the City" will tell you that :P)

The question remains - what is this something else that I want to achieve? How do I go about in achieving them?

I know that staying where I am just because it is comfortable certainly wouldn't help me. Or would it?

"Blood Diamonds" After Thoughts

There's lots of after thoughts from watching "Blood Diamond" Blu-Ray disc last night on our new and shiny LCD screen.

It's already quite difficult to see the actual purpose of my job in this world (aside from providing me with good income). The past year or so, I've been my head been going in this cycle a few time. It's such a conundrum (hihi - the first time I use this word, so I hope I'm using it right). The constant fight between working for money or working for something that I believe in.

Hmm... I must be pretty selfish and narcisstic. I mean - after I watch a movie as eye opening and provoking? (not too sure if this is the right use of word here) as Blood Diamond - all I can think about is my life and my job. But I gotta admit - it was circling in my head throughout the movie last night (with other thoughts). People are dying; shooting at each other; fighting over things; rebuilding the community in Africa (and I'm sure lots of other places) and what am I doing? Every work day, I get up, go to work, have my coffee, then send emails, click on a few things, try to say the right things while browsing websites all day long.

Don't get me wrong... there are parts that I like from my work. I love helping people out. I've always loved doing that. I also enjoy problem solving. But I don't think I get to do those things enough. And when I do, I'm not certain on whether I'm helping the right people or even in the right way. It kinda feels that I can utilise my time and effort to do something else that will help fix the world better.

This morning, I did try and think about how I would go about in fixing the diamond war issue. I mean, if we can't identify the conflict-free diamonds, how do you stop people from buying them? Then, they are already taking the right steps; I mean the "Kimberly Process" must definitely reduce the violence number significantly. I guess it is a little too big for my plate. So I thought I should try and fix things one step at a time. At the moment - my work life is something that can definitely be much further improved. I mean - look at the main cast that in the "Blood Diamonds" movie. They are people who risk their life to do what they do; and even then they still feel they are not doing enough. I want to be able to say the same thing about what I do everyday.

Here's the big thing - life is only once. Shouldn't I be utilising this time and health that I have to the max? There is this part of me that thinks that I could do better things than just working for money. I can help people in a much grander way than just providing them with access to their business reports. Heck, I actually want to do better things. But, am I willing to sacrifice my comfort living to do anything about this?

If you're in the corporation world, have you ever feel the same way? What to do?

Sigh...

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Notes from "Marley & Me"

Live life to the fullest NOW! There won't be any rewind or pause button - however hard you wish for it. And - why on earth would someone want a fast forward button?

But for some strange reason - through the life's downs or cause you think the grass on the other side is greener or just for no reason whatsoever - you (mmm actually - me) attempt to press an imaginary fast forward button.

When that happens, stop and remind yourself... that this very second of your life's down, will never happen again (well - not exactly the same).

So, here's a thought.

Why not try to enjoy it (or at the very least just go through it properly)? Quite possibly, some time in the not-too-distant future, looking back, this second would be one of the moment that makes your life... or at the very least - makes your life's ups feel even sweeter.

"A dog has no use for fancy cars or big homes or designer clothes. Status symbol means nothing to him. A waterlogged stick will do just fine. A dog judges others not by their color or creed or class but by who they are inside. A dog doesn't care if you are rich or poor, educated or illiterate, clever or dull. Give him your heart and he will give you his.

It was really quite simple, and yet we humans, so much wiser and more sophisticated, have always had trouble figuring out what really counts and what does not. Sometimes it takes a dog with bad breath, worse manners, and pure intentions to help us see. Ask yourself, how many people in this world can truly make you feel rare, pure and extraordinary?"
-- Josh Grogan from Marley & Me

Hmm... Pssst, here's another one!
"Sometimes life has a better idea (than us)."
-- Arnie Klein from Marley & Me

Well - I, for one, need to stop wasting my time attempting to fast forward my life; or rewind; or even pause; or worse, live in the past.

I will sort out my priority; savour and appreciate my life as it is at the moment. Cause what I have is abso-f...ing-lutely Fabulous (with a capital F, that is!) ^.^

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Magazine Cover

I walked past a newsstand on the way to work this morning, glanced at the display window and one of the weekly gossip magazine cover caught my eyes. I'm not sure which magazine it was, but it says "Celebrity Real Weight", as in body weight in kilograms.

The first thing that comes to mind was "Why would the magazine think that anyone would be interested to know that information?". Then, "Surely no one is going to buy that magazine because of that cover?". Next, "Hmm.. I wonder if us female are really crazy enough to buy the magazine to get that information." "But why??? It's useless!!" "Is it really useless?" "Sure it is!" "Hmm.. I don't know.. It did get my attention.." "But why did it get my attention?"

OK - that's enough.. Let it go.

One last thing. It's a little sad that with everything that is happening in the world today (global warming, economy crisis, etc), with the vast amount of information flowing around us, and with the inability to find enough time to do the things we want to do and keep up with the rapid changes in our life today - we are still making the time to read and then talk about that type of useless information.
Note: I use the word "we" for a reason... I too commit the crime. *sheepish smile* But, I'm working on it... pushing the urges away. One day at a time. :P

I found the magazine cover.

Bouillabaisse

I went to Chez Olivier last night for an impromptu dinner date with the husband. ^.^ The food was ......... *went speechless from the memory of it* - amazingly good.

I tried Bouillabaisse...
A fish soup containing different kinds of cooked fish and shellfish and vegetables, flavored with a variety of herbs and spices such as garlic, orange peel, basil, bay leaf, fennel and saffron. The broth is traditionally served with a rouille, a mayonnaise made of olive oil, garlic, saffron and cayenne pepper on grilled slices of bread. In Marseille, the broth is served first in a bowl containing the bread and rouille, with the seafood and vegetables served separately in another bowl or on a platter.
-- From the Wikipedia.

The combined taste that was created by the bread, the rouille and the broth was just HEAVENLY... I love it!

The restaurant itself has jump right up the Shelvia's Highly Recommended Places to Eat in Melbourne list. We'll definitely return... with camera! I can't believe I didn't have it with me yesterday. Argh!!! But it's OK - even the more reason to return and check out the cassoulet... :)

Look what I just found on the restaurant's Menu and Wine page.. Special Deals from Sunday to Thursday!!!! =D)
* Our LUNCH MENU is also very attractive with Some Entrees at $9.9, Mains at $17.9 and desserts at the same price of the entrees.
* Lunch Prix Fixe - Combine an entree and a main for $24.0 only and what about three courses for $29.0 only.
* Dinner Prix Fixe - A three course dinner at Chez Olivier for $36, that is thirty six dollars including the GST, YES YOU CAN!!!!

Ah... I love Melbourne, and the Internet. :)

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Tip-Toeing Through Life

I was flicking through a few old photos today.. It's funny to try and remember how I felt when that photo was taken. I'm not sure whether it's just my memory not working really well and I'm easily convinced by my smile on the photo; but I do remember being less "worried" back then. More "in the moment".

I'm not sure when this started - but looking back to my recent past; I feel that I've been tip-toeing through life. I constantly have this worries of my social life in the back of my mind. It feels like a lot of it is fake. Not sincere. I'm pretty sure and remember that it used to be sincere. Now it feels very posed and made up. It feels that I'm hanging by the thread right at the outskirt of the loop; barely in it.

Not too sure why I feel this way. It could be a mixture of things. It could part of growing up. It could be my insecurity. It's possible that I'm in the wrong orbit. Definitely think I should do something about it.

I wanna live my life - TO THE FULLEST. I want to laugh like crazy and mean it. I want to give my all to something and have my heart beats crazily because of the risk of losing it all. I want to run and jump through hoops - instead of tip-toeing. I want to feel challenged. I want to feel alive.

Have you ever feel that way?

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Decided!

I'm changing my name - taking over my husband's surname.
Yihee.. :)

Why?
Cause I want to be unique!!!!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

I like this type of jacket!

Seen this fitted rolled-up-sleeve blazer look twice the past few days.


-- Taken from Lookbook - Caring is creepy.

I like!!! And I want!!! :P

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

This one is for Pipi!


-- Taken from Lookbook - cupcake

Fashion Craze

I really like the way she coordinated this outfit here; don't you??


-- Taken from Lookbook - On a Tuesday.

It probably will just be wishful thinking - but I'd love to dress as simple, cute and well coordinated as this!!! =P

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Just For Laughs...



Ha Ha Ha :)

Maybe :P

Darn! ;P

Friday, February 27, 2009

Why Should You Subscribe to Dumb Little Man?

Because it has this kind of post ... "8 Harsh Truths that Will Improve Your Life - Dumb Little Man".

I like!

I'm still learning to work with truth #2 and applying the realization of truth #4. Truth #7 is very harsh - but true.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Quoting Sis' Quotes

"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity;
An optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty" -- Today's Quote by Shelwin.

I like!

On another note, "Most people seek a soul mate to love them unconditionally. But those who need such acceptance most — the terminally insecure — often sabotage their own chances at bliss. ... Ironically, insecure people seemed to push away a possible source of reassurance by thinking less of their loved ones. ... They try to distance themselves before they get dumped." -- Psychology Today: The Trouble with Insecurity.

Hmm....

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Brain Space Efficiency Tips for Girl

I learned last year that if one worry is taking up your brain space too much or too long; just do something about it!

And if you've been indecisive about something for a few days - decide already! In general, the risk is not worth the time and effort you spend on worrying about it. :P

I feel so much better about my life after I start applying these tips.

Food $$$ Savings Tips

Hmmm.. It's been a while since I properly write a post.
Life's been hectic lately. Good type of hectic though.

Married life is awesome (Better say it is cause my husband actually does read my blog. Nah - just kidding. :P) - it actually is awesome.

I've been rather busy being involved with work (which totally is refreshing - loving it!). On the side, I'm catching up with friends and family. Catching up with TV shows. Figuring out a day-to-day routine that works. Yoga. Cooking (as often as I can). Cleaning (as per required :P). Washing, etc etc.

Oh well - enough updates. Let's talk about food $$$.

I don't know about you - but I certainly have difficulty keeping to my grocery budget. It's scary these days. I'll go to the supermarket to get a few things and it suddenly adds up to $50 or worst, $100!!! These are crazy amount of money to be spending on groceries in this economic climate!! Gosh!

Here's some links that might help you (and most importantly, me!)...
* Best of Frugal Dad | Frugal Dad
* Nine Money-Saving Tips To Eating Greener : Eat. Drink. Better.
* Free Money Finance: Enjoy Eating In and Save Time and Money to Boot
* 75 Money Saving Tips For Surviving A Recession | Frugal Dad
* Grocery Store Savings Tips | Frugal Dad
* Spoiled Rotten
* Easy Ways to Reduce Fruit and Veg Wastage - Healthy Eating, Diets, and Weight Loss Ideas - Dietriffic.com

Well - hope you find handy tips from them. I need to get back to sorting out my honey-holiday photos. :P

Cheerio!