Sunday, June 22, 2008

Worrying: This Article is Freakishly Talking To Me Directly...

"Too many women are fretting about the future instead of savoring happiness now. Find out how to stop the cycle - and get back to enjoying every day."
-- Taken from the article mentioned below!

There is this article in November 2007 edition of SELF magazine titled "Life is good. So why can't you stop worrying?" by Stephanie Dolgoff.

Despite the desire to deny, I have to say some of the paragraphs are way too relate-able. See following extracts...
"When I'm in a worrying mood, I can fret about nearly anything. Doing so makes me feel as if I'm solving a problem, even if the problem doesn't exist yet. My husband, Paul, frequently points out that I get so worked up about preventing snafus that I forget they're hypothetical; I find myself as twisted up as if they've become full-blown disasters. That's a lot of wasted energy..."

"The trouble with this kind of thinking, familiar with it as I am, is that girding yourself for the downturn doesn't necessarily soften the landing, not to mention that it makes it tough to take pleasure in the good times."

"The worst part about being a platinum member of the worry club is that, more often than not, when fretters bite their nails, they sometimes create bona fide things to worry about in the process. I've known women in new relationships that are going along happily, who have still felt compelled to constantly seek reassurance from their partner - "Just tell me you want to break up with me now instead of torturing me!" The result? They drive said partner away, resulting in the feared outcome. "No matter how many times the person answers yes to the question 'Do you love me?' it doesn't do any good. A worrier thinks, Is he only saying that to make me feel better? Or, What if he changes his mind tomorrow?""

"As for why we agonize, "Worriers hope to gain a feeling of sureness," says Robert L. Leahy, Ph.D., author of The Worry Cure (Three Rivers Press). "They want to avoid disappointment or staunch a problem before it gets out of control."

"Breaking the perpetual worry cycle takes separating unproductive fretting from the kind of problem solving that helps everyday life run more smoothly."

Yup - this article is a GREAT EXAMPLE of the reason I chose to subscribe with SELF magazine.

Some tips to stop your stressing (following the article)...
* Choose to stop worrying
* Plan to fret: Take time off, do your worrying, move on!
* Keep a journal of your worrying
* Challenge the possibility of your worry
* Peel an orange (or do something else - distract yourself!)
* Get nostalgic (on your worries which did not come true!)

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